Saturday, April 16, 2005

Home is where the heart is but where is my heart?

Got to love blogs when you start to type and stop to do a spell check and lose your entire blog. Oh well back to the beginning...

Have you ever gone home to visit and feel like your a stranger in a strange land. That's how I feel right now it's a weird place to be. I mean I get home to the place where I lived for most my life and it's not home. Will see if church tomorrow will help at all.

I'm at an interesting place in my life right now; I want to go live with my father in Quebec but my family in Winnipeg don't think I'm doing the right thing because 25 years ago he abandoned us sat me down on a bench in a park and told me that things weren't working out with my mom and that it wasn't us why he was leaving. Then there is the dad that took his place. He was a great dad , but he basically disowned me 14 years ago so I guess even though he raised me he isn't my dad any more or is he? I have no idea. Dad #1 the guy that abandoned me thinks I'm a success while dad #2 in the peg is ashamed of me and my lifestyle. Which one would you choose? I don't hold it against my dad in Quebec that he abandoned us. Him and I have a lot in common like how we go out of our ways to help people and on the flip side how if you screw with us you will be screwed up.

Oh man I am one messed up guy ain't I? I just got a sinking feeling that this may be the last time I can get to know dad #1 and since dad #2 doesn't give a damn about me wtf right. So I will be eastward bound in June to the belle province of Quebec. I hope to get involved with my sisters' lives and get to know them better as well as pick up a second language which will help no matter where I go in this big country of ours.

well that's enough of a rant for me today TTYL
Eric

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