Ever have oneof those days you regret being alive?
I know I have the last 2 days have been a real trial for me and I am down realy far down. I don't think I have my job any longer and not too sure what to do any more. I hit the wall again an don't know how to get back up. I know this doesn't sound like the Eric you all know but this is also a part of me. I go through jobs like some people go through clothes. I tryed to explain it away by saying it was the shift that stressed me out or the calogne but it wasn't I just hit rock bottom again and need Christ to lift me out.
As I sit in a sweltering apartment thinking about the last 3 days. I have come to realize I have come a full circle. Life as we know it is futile and a waste with out Christ and with out God. I am totally at His merci and only He can help me now. I mean what do I tell people about whyI'm not working and how am I going to pay my bills and support the work of God in Timmins. Did I act in God's will by quitting; I don't think so. But what is done is done. I got a lead on another job only problem is it pays way less then I make now and it's doing repetitive work but it will give me my evenings and weekends off which is a good thing. Isn't my sanity worth more then money and how high of a price am I paying? Is it too high?
Do I give up and go home? Is that why I was sent to Timmins to fail? No I didn't think so God would never set me up to fail. It was bad choices on my part that cause me to mess up.
Wow I can't beleave I just typed all of this out. This brings to mind something Paul says in Romans 7:13- .
Law Cannot Save from Sin
13 Has then what is good become death to me? Certainly not! But sin, that it might appear sin, was producing death in me through what is good, so that sin through the commandment might become exceedingly sinful.
14For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am carnal, sold under sin.
15For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do.
16If, then, I do what I will not to do, I agree with the law that it is good.
17But now, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me.
18For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find.
19For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice.
20Now if I do what I will not to do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me.
21I find then a law, that evil is present with me, the one who wills to do good. 22For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man.
23But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.
24O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?
25I thank God--through Jesus Christ our Lord!
Good night everyone
Eric
As I sit in a sweltering apartment thinking about the last 3 days. I have come to realize I have come a full circle. Life as we know it is futile and a waste with out Christ and with out God. I am totally at His merci and only He can help me now. I mean what do I tell people about whyI'm not working and how am I going to pay my bills and support the work of God in Timmins. Did I act in God's will by quitting; I don't think so. But what is done is done. I got a lead on another job only problem is it pays way less then I make now and it's doing repetitive work but it will give me my evenings and weekends off which is a good thing. Isn't my sanity worth more then money and how high of a price am I paying? Is it too high?
Do I give up and go home? Is that why I was sent to Timmins to fail? No I didn't think so God would never set me up to fail. It was bad choices on my part that cause me to mess up.
Wow I can't beleave I just typed all of this out. This brings to mind something Paul says in Romans 7:13- .
Law Cannot Save from Sin
13 Has then what is good become death to me? Certainly not! But sin, that it might appear sin, was producing death in me through what is good, so that sin through the commandment might become exceedingly sinful.
14For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am carnal, sold under sin.
15For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do.
16If, then, I do what I will not to do, I agree with the law that it is good.
17But now, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me.
18For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find.
19For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice.
20Now if I do what I will not to do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me.
21I find then a law, that evil is present with me, the one who wills to do good. 22For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man.
23But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.
24O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?
25I thank God--through Jesus Christ our Lord!
Good night everyone
Eric
3 Comments:
Hi eric. I want you to know that a brother in Ohio is praying for you. You seem to be sincere and open to the Lord. Keep going. Don't give up! Commit your way to Him, even your mistakes! And He will make your path straight.
peace to you.
thank you so much Lew It came at just the right time! God truely is jahova jiro ( The Lord will provide)
Hey eric, Adam here....I just wanted to let you know that i have been praying for you all this week, and for the situation you emailed me with...i just read your blog now, so i will continue to pray for how you are feeling...God loves you so much Eric, you have been through much and overcome so much with God by your side, you are a blessing my brother :)
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